The Struggle

I close my eyes and the world fades away

Shadows float before my eyes

Always inviting, seeking to pull me into their world.

I chuckle, I’ve seen their games before and for sure I am no fool

I search the darkness and images of my past come rushing forward

Some are images that never occurred but only what could have been

I cringe, I shake my head

Emotions swell, my heart races, my palms are wet with sweat

Desire takes hold of me and throws me about

I am a rag doll, straining to break free

I claw and scrape in vain, it’s hold tightens around me

It’s getting harder to breathe, the pain is unbearable, my eyes roll upward searching the heavens

Tears slowly creep down my face, for once I’m truly afraid

Is this the end? Will I not see tomorrow?

I have no choice, I must face what is before me

I look back at my tormentor and scream

Anger swells, my strength returns and I attack that which holds me

I will not be beaten, I will not succumb, only one will see tomorrow

I clench my teeth and I groan, sweat cascades down my face

Stinging my eyes as I continue to struggle.

With everything that is left, I break free

As I float away, I look back and the images of my past fade away

Until the next time

I open my eyes

The world of the real floods back into my being

It is a constant struggle

I face it each hour, every day, every night

Till the day I can’t fight no more.

Give me strength, fill my soul, may I always conquer